This is what I heard: "He's out of control."

Me? "That's not fair," I said.

She rose to her feet. "I don't have to put up with this."

"Out of control?" I asked.

But Dee was already leaving the stands, and as I hurried to keep up with her I stepped through this one and that, every man woman child in my way, even crashing through a young hippie couple standing between the backstop and the concession stand.

Her destination was the limo, and once I got inside, she let me have it. "You don't listen," she said. "You hear what you want to hear and see what you want to see."

"I'm sorry," I said. "What am I supposed to do?"

"Learn from your mistakes."

"I will," I said. "I'll do that. That's what I want to do."

"Oh?" She already had her laptop out. "I think that's beyond you at this point."

She was a storybook figure to me, the Good Witch of the North, Cinderella's Fairy Godmother, and I hated having her mad at me. "Help me then," I said.

"Owners!" she said. "You think you're so important just because you own a baseball team."

I hung my head, rich selfish greedy owner. I could hear the little clicks her fingers made on the keyboard. When they stopped I looked up. "Can we go back to the game?" I asked. I wanted to see Susan again.

My Spirit looked at me with a steady even gaze.

I kept my eyes on her. "Please?" If necessary, I'd beg her.

She didn't speak, and I didn't blink. Finally she said, "Open the door."

Happiness. This time I would keep my mouth shut about O'Ryan.

Surprise, surprise. I was back in Florida. In front of the Royal Crown. Someone was coming out of the entrance.

I came around to her side of the limo. "Oh Dee," I said. "Can't you give me another chance?"

"I did," she said. "You didn't recognize your son. And then you kept watching Susan."

"I used to be married to her."

"That was twenty-five years ago, Mr. Courtland."

"She was my wife."

Steve Carnivore was walking toward us.

"You're supposed to let it go. Move on. Get on with your life."

"But I did," I said. "I did get on with my life, I did move on. I buried everything I ever felt about her a long time ago."

"It came unburied pretty fast."

"It sure did." I said. Steve Carnivore was behind me, waiting for the valet to bring his car up the drive. "You caught me by surprise, Dee." The best agent in the business didn't know our limo was right in front of his nose. "I didn't know I still felt that way."

"And you kept making those spiteful remarks."

"You would too if you were in my shoes."

"Where's your gratitude?"

Is that what it was? "Oh Dee," I said. "I'm grateful, of course I'm grateful."

"You?" she asked. "You're grateful?"

How could I show her? "Believe me, I'm grateful for everything you've done for me."

"Not gratitude for me," she said.

And then Steve Carnivore walked right through me. That was a first, and pretty unnerving. It was hard enough getting used to going through them; I hadn't realized they could go through me.

"For Al O'Ryan," she said. Carnivore now stood directly between us.

I didn't get it. "O'Ryan?" I was still rattled. He had passed right through my body! And I hadn't felt a thing.

"I should think you'd be grateful that Al O'Ryan was there to play catch with your son, and be a father to him."

"Play catch with him?" I asked. "Did he play catch with him?"

"All the time."

"Oh I bet he did, that son of a bitch. I bet he played catch with him."

"There you go again."

"Every time he could, huh? Gave him an excuse to go see Susan!"

"You simply cannot control yourself, can you?"

"Damn it, Dee, that's what a father's supposed to do."

"Exactly. Fathers and sons play catch. And you weren't there!"

"No I wasn't there," I said. "Do you know where I was? I was working that's where I was! Sending dough to Susan! So Mike could play catch!"

"Don't shout at me!"

"He cheated me! I didn't play catch with him! I didn't get to!"

"You're shouting at me!" She was furious now. I had dared to raise my voice to her, talk back to her.

I closed my eyes, took a deep breath, then opened them again. She was still angry. I didn't see how I could bring myself back into her good graces.

"You are one cold-blooded woman," I said. "You won't let me see my own mother, that's not allowed, oh no, but then-- "

"I refuse to listen to this," she said.

"You drag me out to California, force me to see Susan!"

"John? Courtland?"

"And that bastard O'Ryan! Do you know how much money I shipped out to California?"

"Hold on, hold on there, John."

"I never missed a payment! Not one!" Steve Carnivore was blocking my way, and I gave him a push. "I subsidized them! They enjoyed themselves at my expense!"

"Are you all right John?" asked baseball's number one agent.

My hand hadn't gone through him. He was real and I was real and Dee was gone. But I wasn't done with her yet. "Just don't shove my face into the past and expect me to come up with the same answers you get!"

"Who are you shouting at?"

"The blonde," I said. "Did you see where she went, Steve?"

"What blonde?"

I whirled around. "The limo," I said. "It's gone. Did she get back in it?"

Carnivore didn't know whether I was nuts, or drunk, or what, and I had some explaining to do. He asked me if I was okay. I nodded. He should never have seen me.

"Where'd you come from?"

"Sorry if I scared you, Steve." It was irresponsible of her.

"I didn't see you at all." She had let me become visible to him.

He was already trying to figure out if he could use this against me. "It's like she vanished into thin air," I said.

"She probably went inside," he said.

Whatever you want, Steve. That's how I decided to play it. "She probably did."

"You want to go inside?" he asked.

I shrugged. Act like nothing happened. "It's a nice night."

He went with it. "It's snowing up north."

"Five inches in Central City." I'll give you one.

"Bernie Weible," he said. He didn't waste any time.

"Trust me?" I asked.

"Yeah," he said. "That's why I came to see you."

"You came here to see me?"

"The front desk said you were in."

"Bernie 'Trust me' Weible." I wasn't interested.

"You didn't answer, but they said you were in."

"A catcher." I didn't need another catcher.

"The Reds cut him."

"No arm," I said. "He can't throw to second."

"He can still hit. He can DH."

"Hmmm," I said. "Hmmm."